Being a perfectionist

You got so used to perfection; you see it in movies, books, shows, damn, some people pretend it everyday, and you just don’t have a pre-installed lying detector inside of you; so you reached this conclusion that perfection do exist, Hell, you try to become one perfect entity yourself although that ,deep down inside of you, you know you can’t become one but you just punish yourself every single day if you were not perfect. you punish yourself if you did something not so perfectly. What’s really weird and pretty much depressing, you don’t seem to object on the non perfection of your life, thinking that you deserve it..not that it doesn’t exist –well you do know deep down inside that it doesn’t..it is not the point– the point is the fact that being a perfectionist 24/7 ruins your life. the fact that it is either all or nothing to you will get you damned.. but don’t you dare and even think for a moment that this is your fault.. it is not. it is their fault; they are the ones who convinced you that perfection does exist, they lied. you were just naive. Maybe naivety is a crime after all… you are just so damned and your salvation is your worst nightmare. you know that your way out of this maze is to know and realize that you ain’t getting all which means you ll have to change, you will compromise, you will eventually become one of them and maybe in one day you will lose the only thing that distinguishes you from the rest of them…your perfectionism

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2 thoughts on “Being a perfectionist

  1. It is all-or-nothing to me, too, and I AM damned. Thank you for posting fucking relatable stuff, dude.
    P.S. I don’t think we should ever give in to other people’s standards of living/being. It’s sort of okay to keep seeking perfection and to absolutely hate the thought of producing second-rate rubbish (which explains why I miss lots of deadlines and keep bullshitting my way through life). The procrastination/ obsession over anything and everything, no matter how big or small the task is, that’s probably an ENFP thing. It gets very difficult to kick-start shit because it always feels like a “monumental” task to do. The fact that both are interrelated in a way (perfectionism; beautiful kick – procrastination; ugly trap) has always provoked my mind and I have not yet arrived at an adequate treatment for this possible ENFP spell. *wipes own tears* Again, let’s agree that perfectionism is okay to a certain level, but we do need some control—lots of it. 😀

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